Living now is the new happily ever after

I do believe that it is most of the time better not to know what is going to happen in the future. Better not make any prophecies, better not get attached to a dream-image of what life should be like, in a years time, in five years or ten. Oh I admit I am guilty on the crime of dreaming. I dream Big Style and some of this dreams come true with an intensity that it almost makes me believe in the power of dreaming. But some dreams are just there to stay dreams, they are dream-therapy and nothing more. This was the case with a dream about one of my ex-lovers. I could only live with the thought that he was my ex when I made up this scene in my imagination that after everything else would be finally lived we would come together again, now both around 80 years old and everything would be as it was when we were in our early twenties. In reality we will possibly never even see each other anymore and if we will, I might have a dog that can't help to bite my ex and he might leave the café because of this insult and I might after all be quite happy to eat the piece of chocolate-cake that he leaves behind..

I do believe that living now is the new happily ever after. Somehow I found back what I thought I had lost. In totally different circumstances I found back this part of me that was so happy before it 'lost' my ex. Where I thought I lost him, I actually lost a part of myself. When I think of 'living in the now' I don't think of taking things as they are while actually feeling depressed. I think of living in the now as a growing in recognizing what being at ease feels like and consciously choosing to be on that path. A happiness as simple as a banana in the case of sunlight, naturally growing in the direction of the sunlight. I am quite happy though that I have legs and can walk away from where I am not at ease, where my inner sun just doesn't light up. This inner sun does not specifically have to do something with outer sunshine, by the way.. My inner sun can get huge when it is raining and the whole world decides to leave me alone for a day. (I am a mother, 'nothing' going on is something very precious for this species..)

Living now is the new happily ever after is actually the final sentence of a poem that I first wrote in Dutch and recently translated into English. I want to illustrate with this poem, 'Courage, Snow white', that we are all somehow caught up in our own little fairy-tale. Each tale has it's own codes and patterns, and even though circumstances change (so there is a bit of a story to amuse yourself and eventually others), the ingredients stay the same. Whatever I lose or even whoever, it all comes back in (the) poetry (of life) Big Style. My life is my soup and I love every ingredient in it.
Note: all the metaphors used in this blog about 'living in the now' are about food. I am not sorry about this. I am pregnant.

Snow white courage

Seven-league boots don’t suit anyone.
Imagine Snow-white stamped away with them.
To where, she asks. She would have to go
to the highest mountain from the whole of
Laniakea* to look beautiful overseeing it all.  

No the thorns had to go into her feet.
The hunter had to be driven to the edge of his knife
to surrender himself, sobbing in smithereens.
A boy for her life suddenly, the raw leather
a ridiculous costume.

And where would have been the hilarious fever in dwarf skulls?
If some magic would have given seven-league boots to this girl?
And where for her the charm of being stranded at the feet of seven men,
one by one too small to be true, in a hole black enough to start
hallucinating?

There passes the witch, deadly beautiful from being tired.
Blood-alone with her orders. Through her mirror daughter
she learns what poison cannot bite away. Step or not,
she’s someone’s beloved.

But sometimes one creature is made to poison another
and the boots that exist to rapidly get away from this
are only valid in another tale, in an adjacent cluster.

She can never leave from what wants to die or emerge from her.
There passes a prince with a blind karma.
He can’t do anything else.

That kiss is another ‘Oh this moment’.
To live now is the new happily ever after.

* The Laniakea Supercluster (Laniakea; also called Local Supercluster or Local SCl) is the galaxy supercluster that is home to our galaxy the Milky Way, and 100,000 other nearby galaxies.